
Why do I write this? Because there must be a lesson in this somewhere.
I'm not much interested in dwelling upon heedless or reckless behavior. That is too easy. I am quite hopeless in this area anyway. I fall in love easily. I throw myself into adventures and friendships and new ideas without much restraint. But how about this one instead:
Winter is long. Brown earth and sky and the skeletons of leafless trees linger in NYC this time of year and spring comes late. Warm days tease weary, wool-clad city folk and every Sunday a fine old gentleman leaves the 9 o'clock service with a glint in his eye and tells me, "Don't worry dear. Spring is coming." I pause for a moment and think, "Do I wear a tee-shirt that reads 'Seasonal Affective Disorder' or something?" More likely this man is simply a wise read of people.
Life churns and rolls ahead rather obstinately, like the line across my forehead that seems to be deepening on a daily basis. That will be a new one to deal with: smile lines that become permanent creases. But these are the least of my worries and I won't wax poetic here about aging. I think me and this pot of seeds are about looking for a miracle. We could all use a miracle or two. And we all need hope to shout a little louder some days.
And maybe life will spring up where we least expect it.
Hey Carmie,
ReplyDeleteI had a bad case of seasonal affective disorder in Peace Corps. I would curse the sky when the sun went behind the dark gray clouds. I would then sulk around all day murmuring obscenities to myself about how crappy life was. Sun good! I always think of you as that ray of sunshine that picks up your spirits. Spring is just around the corner.
Love you muchly
Brett
Don´t worry dear. If you fall in love easily then this surely won´t be the last time. There will be lots more to come. Falling in love easily also means falling out of it easily.
ReplyDeleteI love that you leave random encouraging messages for me JPittman.... Ummmm, do I know you? Sierra Leon?! Never been there before! :-) Carmen
ReplyDeleteNo, you don´t know me :-)
ReplyDeleteI am originally from near Cairns, Australia and just recently moved to Sierra Leone where my husband is stationed. I found your blog while searching google for information on Africa and have kept reading. Hope you don´t mind my posting comments.
Some of the things you said reminded me of myself about 20 years ago...yes, I actually am getting old ;-) oh and I also have an e-mail address which is Jpittman1958@yahoo.com
Just in case you care to know :-)